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CAP'N PUGWASH LIZOffline
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Post: #1 (ID: 67844)   PostPosted: Mon Jun 29, 2009 23:18    Karma this post: (+4 -0)  
Post subject:  Two Nuns
 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

WARNING----BAD LANGUAGE! Jaw Drop


Spoiler (Click here to reveal) :


Sister Senga and Sister Helen, are travelling from Scotland through Europe in their car. They get to Transylvania and are stopped at a traffic light.



Suddenly, out of nowhere, a tiny little Dracula jumps onto the hood of the car and hisses through the windshield.



"Aw naw!" shouts Sister Senga. "Whit are we gonnae dae?"



"Turn the windae wipers oan. That will get rid of the abomination", says Sister Helen.



Sister Senga switches them on, knocking Dracula about, but he clings on and continues hissing at the nuns.



"Whit ahm a' gonnae dae noo?" she shouts.



"Switch on the windae washirs . I filled it up with Holy Water at the Vatican !" says Sister Helen.



Sister Senga turns on the windae washirs. Dracula screams as the water burns his skin, but he clings on and continues hissing at the nuns.



"It did'nae wurk, whit'll a dae?" shouts Sister Senga.



"Show him your cross!" says Sister Helen.



"Aye, that's whit tae dae." says Sister Senga. She opens the window and shouts.......



"Get tae f - ck aff the f - ckin' car ya wee vampire bar steward!!!!"

_________________
c4l3 c4m5 c4n2 c4q9 c4q5

T'IS 2010 (.....OH GOODY)


YO HO HO HO.............A PIRATE'S LIFE FER ME!


c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7


VINO, RUM,WHISKY,SHERRY NO BE HELP THA CAP'N TAE KEEP WARM IN THA SNAW!


e6m0 e6n1 e6n1 e6m5 e6m9
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madmole
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Post: #2 (ID: 67846)   PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2009 5:05    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
Post subject:  
 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

Laugh Out Loud Laugh Out Loud Laugh Out Loud

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jamieOffline
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Post: #3 (ID: 67849)   PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2009 9:38    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
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 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

the old ones are the best!

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ice maidenOffline
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Post: #4 (ID: 67852)   PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2009 10:58    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
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 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

Laugh Out Loud Laugh Out Loud

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jamieOffline
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Post: #5 (ID: 67853)   PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2009 11:21    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
Post subject:  
 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

At least it wasn't the one about 2 nuns in a bath..... Wink

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>> Come visit Jamie's RANTS, and leave your comments! << - Last post: 10th Mar 2010.    Last reply: 2nd Feb 2010.

>> My current main "spotify" playlist <<

"My inferiority complex is not as good as yours." - Unknown.

>> Live Gower Webcams <<      289 days to Christmas Day !        Word of the day: edriophthalmatous             >> UK stats! <<

Ian "Clarkey" Clarke currently owes me £1223.60
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jacquestheladOffline
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Post: #6 (ID: 67864)   PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2009 14:17    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
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 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

jamie wrote:
At least it wasn't the one about 2 nuns in a bath..... Wink



Yes what about the two nuns in the bath??????
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madmole
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Post: #7 (ID: 67866)   PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2009 14:18    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
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 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

they say "Wheres the soap?" "Yes it does doesn't it !! "Eek !

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CAP'N PUGWASH LIZOffline
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Post: #8 (ID: 67869)   PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2009 16:21    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
Post subject:  
 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

Zat tha one aboot the 'soap' statue? Confused

_________________
c4l3 c4m5 c4n2 c4q9 c4q5

T'IS 2010 (.....OH GOODY)


YO HO HO HO.............A PIRATE'S LIFE FER ME!


c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7


VINO, RUM,WHISKY,SHERRY NO BE HELP THA CAP'N TAE KEEP WARM IN THA SNAW!


e6m0 e6n1 e6n1 e6m5 e6m9
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jamieOffline
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Post: #9 (ID: 67871)   PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2009 17:19    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
Post subject:  
 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

Moley knows it!

It was originally "2 lesbians in the bath. One says 'wheres the soap. The other replies 'yes it does, doesn't it"

I don't know why it was changed to 2 nuns, but maybe that was just a Swansea thing!

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>> Come visit Jamie's RANTS, and leave your comments! << - Last post: 10th Mar 2010.    Last reply: 2nd Feb 2010.

>> My current main "spotify" playlist <<

"My inferiority complex is not as good as yours." - Unknown.

>> Live Gower Webcams <<      289 days to Christmas Day !        Word of the day: edriophthalmatous             >> UK stats! <<

Ian "Clarkey" Clarke currently owes me £1223.60
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CAP'N PUGWASH LIZOffline
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Post: #10 (ID: 67874)   PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2009 21:09    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
Post subject:  
 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

Ah don't get that! Blushing


Need an explaminashin! Blushing

_________________
c4l3 c4m5 c4n2 c4q9 c4q5

T'IS 2010 (.....OH GOODY)


YO HO HO HO.............A PIRATE'S LIFE FER ME!


c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7


VINO, RUM,WHISKY,SHERRY NO BE HELP THA CAP'N TAE KEEP WARM IN THA SNAW!


e6m0 e6n1 e6n1 e6m5 e6m9
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jacquestheladOffline
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Post: #11 (ID: 67890)   PostPosted: Wed Jul 01, 2009 16:00    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
Post subject:  
 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

CAP'N PUGWASH LIZ wrote:
Ah don't get that! Blushing


Need an explaminashin! Blushing




Laugh Out Loud Laugh Out Loud Laugh Out Loud Laugh Out Loud Laugh Out Loud Ask Jamie is the doctor on this site Bouncing Grin Bouncing Grin Bouncing Grin
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ice maidenOffline
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Post: #12 (ID: 67894)   PostPosted: Wed Jul 01, 2009 17:32    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
Post subject:  
 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

CAP'N PUGWASH LIZ wrote:
Ah don't get that! Blushing


Need an explaminashin! Blushing


Ah dinnae get it either Confused

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madmole
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Post: #13 (ID: 67901)   PostPosted: Wed Jul 01, 2009 19:04    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
Post subject:  
 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

Oh, you lot!!!
Laugh Out Loud

'Wheres' the soap' as in 'Wears the soap' (out) as in using it for something else!! Blushing Blushing

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ice maidenOffline
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Last Listened on Tue Mar 02, 2010 19:19 : ABBA - Does Your Mother Know (Album: Gold: Greatest Hits)
Post: #14 (ID: 67912)   PostPosted: Wed Jul 01, 2009 22:08    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
Post subject:  
 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

madmole wrote:
Oh, you lot!!!
Laugh Out Loud

'Wheres' the soap' as in 'Wears the soap' (out) as in using it for something else!! Blushing Blushing


Nup ...................... Ah must be a real wee innocent a1k1 cos Ah still dinnae get it Blushing Blushing

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c5f5 CAUTION! Ah can go fae 0 tae bitch in 1.3 seconds c5g3
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Stormy Petrel
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Post: #15 (ID: 67915)   PostPosted: Wed Jul 01, 2009 22:25    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
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 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

ice maiden wrote:
madmole wrote:
Oh, you lot!!!
Laugh Out Loud

'Wheres' the soap' as in 'Wears the soap' (out) as in using it for something else!! Blushing Blushing


Nup ...................... Ah must be a real wee innocent a1k1 cos Ah still dinnae get it Blushing Blushing



Strewth, and I thought you were a real Ann Summers girl, Icy Laugh Out Loud Laugh Out Loud Laugh Out Loud

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e7a4
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CAP'N PUGWASH LIZOffline
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Post: #16 (ID: 67917)   PostPosted: Wed Jul 01, 2009 22:42    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
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 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

Blushing neither dae Ah! Blushing


why is she wearin' soap? Confused

_________________
c4l3 c4m5 c4n2 c4q9 c4q5

T'IS 2010 (.....OH GOODY)


YO HO HO HO.............A PIRATE'S LIFE FER ME!


c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7 c4q7


VINO, RUM,WHISKY,SHERRY NO BE HELP THA CAP'N TAE KEEP WARM IN THA SNAW!


e6m0 e6n1 e6n1 e6m5 e6m9
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madmole
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Location: South Wales
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Karma yesterday, day before: 1107, 1107
Gallery Entries : 90

Last Listened on Fri Mar 05, 2010 14:52 : Smash Mouth - Your Man (Album: Smash Mouth)
Post: #17 (ID: 67920)   PostPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2009 6:28    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
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 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

Not wearing as is in 'clothed in' but wearing (out) as in using it up quickly.................... JEEEZ!!

Jamie get in here and explain yourself Laugh Out Loud Laugh Out Loud

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ice maidenOffline
BOAT CHIEF IRONIN' 'N WASHERWUMMIN
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Joined: 15 October 2004
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Karma: 1261
Karma yesterday, day before: 1261, 1260
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Last Listened on Tue Mar 02, 2010 19:19 : ABBA - Does Your Mother Know (Album: Gold: Greatest Hits)
Post: #18 (ID: 67925)   PostPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2009 7:52    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
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c9r9

It makes sense noo Blushing Blushing Blushing (that be naughty Laugh Out Loud Laugh Out Loud )

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jamieOffline
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Post: #19 (ID: 67928)   PostPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2009 10:28    Karma this post: (+0 -0)  
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 Posted from: United Kingdom Reply with quote

hahaha! What have I done!!

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>> Come visit Jamie's RANTS, and leave your comments! << - Last post: 10th Mar 2010.    Last reply: 2nd Feb 2010.

>> My current main "spotify" playlist <<

"My inferiority complex is not as good as yours." - Unknown.

>> Live Gower Webcams <<      289 days to Christmas Day !        Word of the day: edriophthalmatous             >> UK stats! <<

Ian "Clarkey" Clarke currently owes me £1223.60
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